Second Choice
I had a dream last night that was also a nightmare. I saw someone from my past that I loved and I chased after them; they chased after another. I went through hell to get to them and when I got to them they had to make a choice: me or the other. She looked to me and without hesitation I said, "Choose him, true love can't be denied and it will always find its way." I smiled and she put the ring back in my shirt pocket. As I walked away I turned back to see the new couple embracing each other under fireworks, such a beautiful sight. Towards the end of the dream I began to film what I saw around me and fight through the pain of being someone's second choice, then I woke up.
My Grandmother used to tell me, "never knock on closed doors," I guess you can see where I'm going with that. When you wake up from a dream like that, a dream that is your literal past, it's hard to wrap your mind around what is beautiful and just. We live in a caged world but that doesn't mean you can't be free. Freedom STARTS in the mind, freedom STARTS when you look at dreams like that and remind yourself that they are just that: DREAMS.
Your REALITY is this: you are STRONG, BEAUTIFUL, and REMARKABLE. You have survived hell by FAITH and you are MORE than a conqueror. If you were ever a second choice remember that you are GOD's FIRST choice. The amount of love that lives in your heart can't be contained by CAGED people which is why they left. And it's okay not to be okay.
I'm here to remind you that there is beauty in tragedy and to NEVER compromise your character just to be a second choice. If I never allowed myself to be that second choice I wouldn't be here sharing with you, I wouldn't be as free as I am now, and I wouldn't be aware of my SELF WORTH.
It's okay to cry, scream, fall to your knees, because you need to mourn but when the last tear has fallen PICK YOUR HEAD UP. These things happened, accept them, and share your story to help others. That's what these tests and trials are for. Be brave and be kind beautiful one, trust your struggle.
