How Will You Respond?

Hi Beautiful One,

I'm hurting today, but I'm also full of grace today. If you have been following along, I have made a lot of changes. I have repositioned my entire being towards God's purpose and not my own. It has been tough, if you remember me talking about Growing Pains in a previous blog post. Today, hell over the last week, I have thought about something my Grandma used to say to me:

"Dogs don't bark at parked cars baby."

Recently I have been on the receiving end of the treatment I have dished out to others when I was consumed by anger. I have had a first hand experience with some hurt people trying to hurt me. What's crazy is that it is warranted for I have not been great. On this road to healing, we all are going to fall short everyday. I'm afraid in my falling short I may have triggered some people. I may have created a negative around me that I never intended. In my growth, I looked to past habits for comfort and the cost of this has been taking its toll. It's a harsh reality to accept and yet I'm not completely accepting it too.

You see, the one thing that I have noticed since I have made these changes is that life seems to be putting me through the ringer. All of a sudden, all hell is breaking loose. Situations that I would never be in are now here. I would normally spiral into a deep self loathing sadness, but I can't help but think to myself "no, I will not be defeated by the dark opinion of my past". Instead of attacking these situations, I am choosing to release them.

When my Grandmother said what she said, I thought it meant that when I'm making millions there will be haters all around me. What I didn't see was that where there is growing light there is always stalking darkness to test your resolve. On this road to better, I have achieved things that I used to talk about. I took a metaphorical sledgehammer to the busted foundation and began to build a new one on love, family, and legacy. God has been good to me, in spite of the past, and I owe it to Him to respond in a way that glorifies His love in my life.

So you know what I did today? I prayed for my enemies. I prayed that they find love and healing. I prayed for them and I meant it. I meant every tear and I still mean every word right now because I used to be a hurt person hurting other people. I used to be an angry person, but when healing is in your heart there's no room for vengeance. When you meet yourself with grace, you meet others with it too. I have finally built my heart, mind, and soul on a foundation of love. I have finally learned the best response to hell is with the grace and mercy of heaven.

Listen to me, no matter what is going on, don't let these situations make you think you are the same you that was led by chaos. That's what darkness comes to do, snuff out your light. So, don't let it! When trouble comes, oh it will come, don't respond with more trouble. Respond with kindness. Open your arms to it in love. As every tear falls, let a cry out for those that are hurting. As the pain tries to eat away at your soul, radiate light. We beat the darkness by freeing ourselves from it. Our response must be different becuase we are different. We are citizens of the Free World. We know pain but choose healing. We know anger but we choose peace, and the more we respond the more we show that the Free World cannot be caged by darkness ever again. You have come too far to come this far. We have come too far to come this far.

So, when trouble comes ask yourself, how will you respond?

I want you to keep your head up, be encouraged, and know that you are loved. You are a member of the Free World: a world without shame, without fear, a world where being who YOU are is expected. Be patient with yourself because everything is a process. Remember life is a marathon not a sprint. You'll make it through this week!